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Post by ADH7901 on Oct 4, 2003 11:33:36 GMT -5
“But there was intelligence in the breathing, and passion in that breathing, everything there, we could take that breathing and hold its hand, sit on its lap while watching TV, the breaths where quicker and shorter and quicker and shorter and then shallow, shallow and that’s when I loved her as much as any other time, when I knew her as I thought I knew her –oh, she was out, she was gone, a week into the morphine maybe, and she could go any minute, her systems were falling apart or gone, no one had any idea what was keeping her going but she was sucking in that air, she was breathing so erratically, weakly, but she was doing it so desperately, each breath taking all that she had, her small person, with her beautiful tanned skin shiny, Beth and I draped over her, not knowing when- But she would just breathe, and breathe, suddenly, anxiously, unyielding- And I only hope it wasn’t regret, that there wasn’t regret there, in those breaths, though I know there was, I dream there was, when I hear the breaths, I can hear the anger- She could not fucking believe this was actually happening. Even while sleeping under the morphine and when we were only waiting, expecting, she would snap back, would rise suddenly and say something, cry out, a nightmare- furious about this bullshit, that something like this was actually happening, that she was leaving all of us, Toph- She was not ready, not even close, was not resolved, resigned, was not ready- ” This is one of the passages in one of my favorite books, "A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius", that makes me cry...it's so sad.   |
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Post by Krissy2003 on Oct 4, 2003 11:35:47 GMT -5
Aww that is sad |
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Post by ADH7901 on Oct 4, 2003 11:39:08 GMT -5
Aww that is sad |
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Post by Krissy2003 on Oct 4, 2003 12:11:53 GMT -5
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Post by ADH7901 on Oct 4, 2003 12:18:19 GMT -5
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Post by Krissy2003 on Oct 4, 2003 12:46:59 GMT -5
*hugs back* |
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Post by EternalFlame7901 on Oct 4, 2003 16:01:04 GMT -5
The very beginning reminds me of when my Grandma was dying in the hospital. But I know she was ready to go... she wanted to go home at that point... |
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Post by ADH7901 on Oct 4, 2003 16:33:40 GMT -5
The very beginning reminds me of when my Grandma was dying in the hospital. But I know she was ready to go... she wanted to go home at that point... awwwww *hugs* she's at peace now, hun... I love you hunnie  |
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Post by EternalFlame7901 on Oct 4, 2003 17:12:52 GMT -5
awwwww *hugs* she's at peace now, hun... I love you hunnie I love you, too, babes!!! |
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Post by Krissy2003 on Oct 4, 2003 17:24:02 GMT -5
The very beginning reminds me of when my Grandma was dying in the hospital. But I know she was ready to go... she wanted to go home at that point... Aww hun im soo sorry...i have never had to go thru thatrt, and u should have to either. No one should.Im soo sorry |
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Post by LuvLiyah4life on Oct 4, 2003 19:27:02 GMT -5
The very beginning reminds me of when my Grandma was dying in the hospital. But I know she was ready to go... she wanted to go home at that point... aaaaw... *warm hug* |
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Post by ADH7901 on Oct 5, 2003 12:15:57 GMT -5
I love you, too, babes!!! You're so amazing, you know that? |
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Post by EternalFlame7901 on Oct 5, 2003 12:27:53 GMT -5
You're so amazing, you know that? Awww, you're amazing to the millionth power... *does her Derick Lee & Li-Li* I love you, mayun!!!!!!!
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Post by ADH7901 on Oct 5, 2003 12:29:55 GMT -5
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Post by EternalFlame7901 on Oct 5, 2003 12:30:22 GMT -5
Aww hun im soo sorry...i have never had to go thru thatrt, and u should have to either. No one should.Im soo sorry Awww... I wish she didn't have to go in a hospital... but since she did, I'm actually thankful that I could spend her last days with her. |
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